If you treat others as your equal, you should be treated as one in return.
...or so goes the theory. If I live my life with respect for people even after they prove they lack respect for me, I would assume they'd eventually come around. In fact, instead of meeting me at my level, I seem to have stooped to theirs.
As an Employee:
My flakey boss who underpays me has sparked a sneaky, money-minded, obsessive who carefully keeps a record of his hours, his efforts, and his income, so as to make a full argument at the next sign of any further mistreatment. I've given her plenty of time and opportunity, and now it's up to her to not only fulfill her duties, but give of herself a little in the ways that I have given of myself a lot.
As a Gay man:
Seriously, I'm sick of my rights being overlooked. I am better-behaved than many of my straight friends, more Christian in my actions than most religious leaders, and I feel a generally nicer, more caring person than a lot of people around me. I'm tired of being alone and being lonely, and when I finally get myself a man--a GOOD man, I'm going to be with him and live just like everyone else, so these people in the government (including the one I helped put there because of his campaign promises) better get their Mother-fucking, God-damn ACTS together before I go there personally to make my individual voice heard.
As a Student:
Basically being ignored by SCAD has birthed a whistle-blowing, indignant, frustrated individual on the warpath for justice and recognition. Four years I've been with this school, and three years I've gotten lip service from my superiors about my talents and my potential as I am overlooked for scholarships or given opportunities without adequate time to fulfill them. Most recently, I fought to have my last year of school not prove to be a total disaster, but we all know that didn't work out. Now, attempt number two at Senior Collection, and the class has been changed to limit our creativity and self-expression significantly. I'm going to talk to anyone and everyone until I get a legitimate answer and possibly an exemption to return to last year's objectives. Round one: Emails is well under-way. As for the school itself, I was not once notified of any Senior goings-on (as I am usually 'forgotten' about vital things like interview invitations or valuable speaker visits), and will not fall through the cracks yet again. I am waiting for just the slightest opportunity to call bullshit on that entire school, and don't think for a moment I will hesitate to do just that.
As a Roommate:
Worst of all, living with people who treat me as a second-class citizen first enticed me to give above and beyond, but has now sucked the enthusiasm out of me. It's a shame when you want to leave an entire city and all of its opportunities only TWO WEEKS early because of [mainly] two CUNTBAGS who you see for literally a few hours a day, if that. One was almost the sole cause for stress, and while I will be sad to see her go, her announcement of imminent departure has certainly brought a relief. However, increasingly since--and especially tonight--the other has been growing an attitude and an ego on par with her in exodus. Just tonight, after cleaning for the afternoon before THEIR guest comes (as I have done before for their other visitors), murmured remarks were made with "I love that..." that I can only assume were along the lines of "look who's finally cleaning" or something of paramount bitchiness. In fact, I've cleaned up ahead of and behind them for weeks now, keeping mental track of what I clean when to assure myself I do, indeed, give more than the others. Because of this, there is not a chance in HELL I will be paying the same amount for rent this coming month. Giving more rent than I have been able to afford in the past is fair, and indeed I have wanted to up my contributions since my arrival, but I was told IN DECEMBER I could live here for less until I could afford more, and I have not been able to. Finally, I can afford more, but not that much. Truthfully, I gave up a bedroom of my own because I could not pay equally (which I was told is fine, and that's why I decided to move in). Things have not changed, and I have been given no private room, so I will not pay for one. Fuck fairness, this is on principle alone. I am not treated like an equal member of this house, so I refuse to give an equal amount to it. I could say "sorry" if I meant it, but I don't, so, to those people who continually complain about other people or get mad for nothing or pick fights or behave like blind, arrogant hypocrites: Get over yourselves.
Cross your fingers for the battles coming that I need to fight. I'm not going to pick them, but I am no longer giving in, and since I basically have to repeat my Senior year of college, I'm going to do it VERY differently. However, don't worry or misread me--I'm the same person, and will still behave the same way in my daily life. I just mean that if someone pushes me now, I'm going to push back.
Posts
